The inexplicable nonexistence of hemp jeans
For the vast majority of reasonable humans found anywhere on the planet, jeans are the greatest invention in the medium of apparel in the history of human civilization. They look …
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Why Chacos are the Microsoft of the sandal world
Consider for a moment the icons that have emerged throughout history that have come to represent a once great, but now flailing, and ultimately doomed creature, whose glory days have …
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You crazy kids and your plush party hostels!
Allow me to share with you the depth of my experiences, the wisdom of my years, the precision of my insurmountable intellectual prowess, in this unmitigated burst of rantastical glory, …
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The Potemkin Steps, i.e. my confusion
Odessa is a pretty nice place to visit. It’s an attractive city laid out in an easily navigable grid pattern (damn you, twisting and turning old-timey mazes!), and it has …
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10 amazing animals that prove Avatar is stupid
“He created a whole world!” “The animals were amazing!” “It was so inventive!” Bullshit. Any cursory discussion of Avatar will result in globally ignorant morons extolling the virtues of the …
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Every water bottle on the planet is stupid
There comes a time every year during which I endeavor to resolve what I think should be a simple, straightforward predicament that even the most cursory application of intellectual effort …
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My love affair with Russian train travel
Welcome, children. Welcome one and all. Welcome to my nightmare. The nightmare of insufficient transportation infrastructure. But for all the night-bus-related nightmares I’ve experienced, I have lived the dream. And had …
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